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Tuesday, 23 September 2014

When A Cute Guy At Starbucks Denies His Profile On Hornet

So I was at the same Starbucks today where I previously got cruised and noticed this very cute guy in front of me while lining up to buy coffee. He was probably in his early twenties . Very young and if I'm not mistaken, just feels very countryside French in terms of his looks. I can't describe it but I can feel it. 

I tried to initiate some form of eye-contact but there was no positive response from him. Then I tried to listen to how he ordered his coffee and thought I heard some accent which further reinforced my assumption that he is French.

"Well, you can't have everyone in the world", says my inner voice and felt free after deciding to let things go. The guy later got his coffee and went to get a table. So did I.

As I sat down at my corner, I turned on Hornet and spotted the closest profile that was next to mine, in which the guy in it says that he is French and I swear, has a gallery of pictures that looked exactly like the cute guy I was noticing. I am 95% sure that it was him. Oh my God, he's on Hornet and looking for friends! This is so meant to be, we have to go talk to him.

I immediately sent him a message on Hornet and awaited for his reply. However, due to his profile not having a green dot on the top left corner, I just assumed that he was offline. So I remained seated for another few more minutes to think about how to approach this without looking like a complete freak or stalker.

A part of me says that it's inappropriate, or maybe even rude to walk up to a guy. But another part kept reminding me of my many missed opportunities and the regrets that came with it. Of how I should always have more courage to take risks and never let opportunities pass me by.

So after going back and forth, I decided to embrace the underlying formula that comes with rejection.
Rejection = Good
Rejection = Growth
Rejection = Freedom from Fear
Rejection = What I Need
Rejection = Catalyst for Success.

Hence, I decided to face rejection and embarrassment head on. Because for every rejection that I experience, I become a hundred miles more courageous and a thousand miles freer in my quest.

So I walked right up to him, smiled and then pulled out my phone with his Hornet profile. In a voice and tone for which I feel I sounded my friendliest, I went: "Hi! Excuse me, I was just wondering if this is your profile?" 

He took one look at my screen and immediately denied it. "No. That is not me. Who is that? I don't know who that is", he said in a tone where I only half believed him. Something doesn't sound quite right with his answer, but what can I say?

"Ah I'm so sorry. Must have confused you with another friend. So sorry", and then I excused myself and went back to my seat. Obviously not without doing the walk of shame for which everybody in the café was enjoying. The witnesses were probably laughing at me. 

Wait, who the fuck cares about them? I. Was laughing at me. Jesus, I wanted to bury my head in the sand or have the earth swallow me up right now. I am so embarrassed for taking my own advice. So stupid!

Anyway later in the evening when I came home, his profile was no longer accessible to me like how it was this afternoon. The pictures were all privatised and it was as if it all happened with such coincidental timing. So was it him or was it not him? Guess I will never find out. But you know what, that's okay.


  1. Replies
    1. Too much coincidences, I think so too. XD
      Ah, you didn't look stupid! Like RB wrote, he was (a little) rude and he should have been friendly to you in any way.
      You made a good choice (trying to talking with him) in my opinion! :)

  2. Most likely it was him. Denying it was just rude. He should have been at least friendly to you even if he wasn't interested.

    1. Nah, that's okay. I can actually understand why he chose denial as his first immediate instinct. I mean if I was in his shoes, I would probably be very leery too about strangers suddenly approaching me with my gay profile on his phone. Although I personally would be more open about things, but then again, different people react differently.

      But anyway, thank you so much for your reassurance. It does make me feel like I didn't look too stupid. :)

    2. I think your instincts are good there. It's kinda jarring to have someone drop that out of the blue and people come from a variety of comfort levels so their reactions will vary. I think you would have gotten a different reaction if you asked if his accent was French and then slowly brought up the hey-you-look-familir line and asked about the app. But that's just my approach...

    3. I think I was very impatient too. I didn't have the heart and energy to chat him up because it was either he is open to people approaching him or he isn't. So in this case, I could understand why he denied it and it's okay. But I am so glad this experience happened to me. I learnt so much and have grown more courageous. Thanks Bruce!